Furqan Mohamed is a writer from Toronto. Her work centers around culture and social justice, and is often inspired by her diaspora, community, and the stories that can stem from the shared human experience. Her debut collection of poetry and prose, “A Small Homecoming,” was recently published by Party Trick Press.

A sincere poem about heartbreak and self-love.

“This poem is about a moment I shared with my lola (grandma) that changed the meaning of ‘morena’ for me. She didn’t remember this conversation when I asked her about it years later, but this specific interaction was the start of self-acceptance for me.”

“Growing up in a conservative country that is Philippines, there are certain challenges that come with being a Catholic Filipina. No matter how much I yearn to read poems and articles that cover sensitive or “taboo” topics, I can never seem to find any that leave an impact.”

“This prose is called ‘Interlude’, and it is a self-loving piece. I wrote this with the purpose to connect with myself on a deeper level, in order for me to release unwanted energy given by others for the sake of my own sanity.”

“Imposter’s syndrome is something I’ve battled a lot through my life. There’s this existential fear that weighs on you every day, that everyone will experience this a-ha moment and realize that you’re not as great as they think you are. You watch other people at your job doing the work and you think to yourself that it’s only a matter of time before they discover your secret and kick you out to the street.”

“White takeout styrofoam containers were the bowls of my childhood. They came when the sky smeared with charcoal and the playground rumble of daycare softened to faint whispers. On those weekday evenings, I would tilt my 10-year old head to listen: for the trill of keys and clink of pen in pockets, the thump of pointed work shoes and the ratting, dry coughs of my father; sounds and sights that told me - that even in this strange, lonely place full of faceless kids - I was home.”

“I recognize the weight my words carry, especially the ones I’ve carelessly said towards my loved ones. It shocks me when they mention something I’ve said years ago and express how much it still hurts them to this day. As selfish as it sounds, I don’t even remember saying it or the damage I caused. I know in my heart of hearts that I never intended for it that way. But you can still hurt someone without intentionally realizing it. I carried on with my life not taking in the cause and effect of my words.”

“A massive part of misogyny has always relied on identifying women only through reference to another person, most likely a man. It really can come to a point that this practice makes it highly probable for the individual name to be forgotten. The poem makes mention of male characters in Jose Rizal’s Noli me Tangere: all who play significant roles in the story, or rather, lack of story, to the female lead, Maria Clara.”

“My parents moved to Canada as teenagers fleeing the Vietnam war in the 70s for a better life without a single dollar in hand. I grew up in a predominantly white suburban town in Ontario, which shaped a lot of my complex relationship about being Asian.”

“We often forget to stop and appreciate how far we’ve come in our journeys, thinking of what’s next and what more we can do to get to where we want to be… ’Love in Los Angeles’ is a photo series about pausing and taking a step back to admire the work we have done, tuning out what more we have to do and what others might be accomplishing in their lives.”

“The inspiration of this poem came from the idea that in order for the butterfly to emerge; it must first go through cycles of growth; before it can spread its wings and roam free. The cocoon represents the confinement one can feel when trying to break free. A slight hold yet it is as light as silk, much like the makings of a cocoon.”

Miss Ysabelle Tumaneng is Miss Vancouver World 2020, and she has written this letter explaining her story, her understanding of pageantry, and in how she was able to connect back to her Filipina roots.